Under One Roof

Father. We are taught in school that fathers are the providers in the family. They are the ones who work hard so there’s food on the table, kids are sent to school, and everything is in place in our lives. We are taught in school that they are the protectors and pillars of strength at home.

But not all fathers are like that. Some fathers are jobless, stay at home husbands who do the chores and other stuff that mothers are supposed to do. There are fathers who are weak, sick and scared of things. They can’t protect themselves much less their families. Some fathers are sources of chaos in the house. There are different fathers out there, very much unlike the ideal one we’re taught in school.

But there are fathers nonetheless. They gave us life whether accidentally or not. I know that some are unlovable, even hard to stomach but there are still our fathers. They deserve even a splinter of attention from us.

What kind of father do you have? Did you greet him yesterday?

Let me tell you what kind of father I have.

My dad used to be one who’s maloko. He did stuff men are known for. He is also not one for affection. He grew up not used to saying “I love you” or giving hugs. He was not like that and I don’t think he will get used to it. When my mom died, I thought that he would also spiral downward. He was used to having my mom by his side. But I think it motivated him to do better with me and my siblings. He became a father and mother to all of us. He took over chores that my mom used to do. Clean the house, cook, remind of us stuff when we’re about to go out of the house… those things he took over without saying anything. We wanted to get someone to help us at home but he refused as we’re not used to having a stranger at home. So he took over and I think it’s his way of telling us that we still have a parent in him even though mom’s no longer here.

To say that we appreciate him more is an understatement. I think I can say on behalf of my siblings that we got to know dad more. We became closer. And we appreciate him now more than ever.

As the eldest, I am the one who is thinking more about dad’s welfare. Since he ‘retired’ from work early, he does not have benefits to look forward to in his old age. But he need not worry about that. I am taking care of it. I am saving up for him. I am already planning for his old age.

We already lost our mother. What we failed to do for mom we promised ourselves we will do for dad.

Happy Father’s Day to all fathers in the world! I hope you celebrated and enjoyed your day.