Yesterday, my sister and I went to the grand aunts’ house. We dropped by for a visit and as usual we ended up talking about a lot of things including their past. My sister and I told them about our recent visit to my maternal grandfather’s place in Batangas and we got to talk about my maternal grandmother. They were separated and the latter died without them ever forgiving each other for their bitter short-lived marriage.
One thing that stuck with me during our conversation was how my maternal grandma mellowed down when we her grandchildren came into her life. That’s according to the grand aunts. She would often tell those who would listen that she’d stop being tired when she’d see us her grandchildren. I almost cried when I heard that.
You see, the past few months before she died, we hardly ever visit her. We just couldn’t look at her and see her suffer! It was too much for us. We would go visit and spend ‘quality time’ with her but then it would take us a week or so before we visit again. Looking back I feel so guilty for not spending more than enough time with her on her last few months on earth. Sure, we would get to spend more than an hour visiting and talking to her about a lot of things. But seeing her bedridden and hearing her slur in her speech…
What really is ‘quality time’, anyway?
I don’t think it’s enough. Looking back, we should have spent not “quality” but A LOT of time with our grandmother. It pains me to realize this belatedly. We should have been there for her more.
So you people who think quality time is enough time to be spending with your love ones, go and change the way you think now. Quality is never enough.